Camwhores: From Hulu Jungles to Middle of the Seas

Mary-Kate and I went yamcha one night and when we looked out to the sea, we saw carlights. On the sea! At first I said it was a boat but then after looking long and hard, it was totally carlights. So we thought there was like, this secret passageway that leads all the way out to the sea and so we planned to go there - even though I had this terrible fear that if we drive out there, something horrible would happen and the car would fall into the sea or something like that. But anyways, once we reached there, it was so anti-climactic because there wasn't any magical road on the sea or anything, it was just a reaaaaally reaaallly looong walkway for motorists and anglers. So we walked and walked and it lead out really far, like all the way to the middle of the sea. It took us like half an hour to reach the end and it was soooo purrdy, cuz it was really really dark and quiet and totally removed from humanity. LOL. So Mary-Kate and I were saying like, how cool would it be if we came here early in the morning to watch the sunrise and get some snaps of it. So the next day right, when everyone was busy rushing off to school, we were already on the way to the beach. How fierce is that? My dad was totally speechless when he saw me up and ready in the a.m. (I usually hibernate till teatime LOL). Anyways, it was totally worth it cuz we got some major shots :D

I think the nicest JUMP pic I ever took :)

The first termenung pic
2nd termenung pic. It's not that I lack variety, it's cuz everytime I don't look at the camera, the pics get nicer LOL

Looking in the general direction of Shanghai ;) hehe

Few days after the first camwhore session was the drama competition at Kuala Berang. So me, Mary-Kate, Anis and Piqah took a road trip there. Yup, me, manual, 40 minutes, fierce. Anyways, we felt sooo out of place when we reached that kehulu-huluan school cuz everyone be staring like they ain't seen fabulosity before. Anyways, like all events related with Malaysian VIPs and opening ceremonies, the competition was of course delayed. So we went in search of food but a 15 minute search turned up nothing so we ended up at a Petronas eating junk food. With lots of time to spare, we decided to hit up Terengganu's famous waterfalls, Sekayu.

Famous, my ass. The place looks as deserted as a town in a bad zombie movie. Can't understand why in the world touristy spots like this get so terbiar. So, we decided to go to another waterfall which is supposedly nearby. Well, it's not so nearby after all cuz after driving for quite some time, we're still on the same small road that gets tinier and tinier by the meter, and is bombed with cow shit. We later saw a herd of like, 30, 40 cows so that explains why the roads are like a cow shit obstacle course. After we stopped searching for the falls, we came across this spot which is like sooooo perfect for camwhoring. Everything was green and silent. Until we came along, that is :D I bet all the nearby FELDAs could hear us screaming and giggling

This is exactly like the first termenung pic at the beach, but by the road LOL
My mom went crazy when she saw this pic. "How can you guys take pictures on a road that's curved? You can't even see oncoming cars blah blah blah" LOL. There are NO cars Momma
Childhood in the 70's?

I also discovered that I have picked up some of Cyntia's skills cuz some of the pics I took for my friends are so fierce, unlike what I used to do with my shitty photog skills last time. And of course, I've also picked up a bit on HowYee's major editing talents. Yay me :D

Mean Girls, 2008

So much drama! Last couple days I've showed up at school for a few times to like, help out with the drama team - God were they beyond help, but that's another story - and since I've been hanging out with X lots and lots lately, naturally we went to school together right? Anyways, there's Y in school, who used to like X and whom I guess is still crushing on X but X has already made it clear that the feeling's not mutual. Anyways, Y is really popular in school I guess, so there's this bunch of bitches who all got crushes on Y. And one of 'em, W, is in the drama team. So me and X showed up at rehearsals right, and couple of minutes in, I noticed that W's phone is pointing right in my direction. I am usually very delusional but I know that this time, I wasn't being perasan or anything. So I turned to X who was sitting beside me and asked "Do you notice there's someone taking our picture over there?" And X saw it too. So we were like, "freak, what's up with that?" but we didn't like give a shit after that.
Then later on, I met with A, who's friends with W but closer still to me. So anyways, A's got this whole conversation between W and Y. Goes something like this:

W: X mu mari sekolah.
Y: Betulke? Mu tegur tak?
W: Tak, malas ah. Dia rapat ngat ngan Jeffrey tu.
Y: Ya ke? Jeffrey tu kan bf baru dia. Jangan cakap pasal dia lagi la. Benci ah. Suruh X pergi mati je la..

So anyways, this information leaked to both me and X and we were like majorly pissed. W has been giving us major stink-eye the whole day and is now down to the level of spreading rumors. How high school. W has this slutty friend, Bitch who has also been glaring and staring at us for hours, and also storing our pictures in her phone. (Got this info from A also). Hello, what are we? Zoo animals? These 2 fatties have serious issues, and they need to get over them fast.
And after that, before we go back, this bugger comes up to X and ask "What's your name again? X? You mean, you're the X?"and both of us was like 'What the huh was that supposed to mean?'
Drama giler. During my years (whoaa, during my years, did that make me sound 40 or what?), kids were all sugar spice and everything nice. But high school is like, sooo mean now. I should totally grow up and stop starting shit with 15 year-olds who look like they can beat me up heh ;)

Melawat Kawan-kawan Ku

Couple days ago, Mama came back. So we did what we usually do when we meet up in KT, which is update each other on our love/sex lives, go through The Catalogue and after yamcha sessions all over town, we got into the car and did our absolutest favoritest thing to do at night in KT; kacau-ing the prostitutes at Jln Tok Lam (??) - I'm not too sure. Like, how cool is this? Sluts making fun of other sluts! Woo~
We've been doing it since forever and the only thing different this time is that Petiunia Seng was with us and we actually talked to one of them. Usually, we'd just sit in the car and whistle them over and when one of 'em would come near, we'd speeeed away real fast and laugh ourselves stupid. This time though, we decided that we want to talk to them. But we don't wanna do the boring thing of asking about prices and that kinda shit, cuz it's like, so predictable and so unfun, right? So the conversation goes along the lines of something like this...

Round 1:
Mama: (Rolls down car window and all of us wave) Hi :D

Tranny: (Looks away and ignores us)

Mama: Hi!!!~~

Tranny: (Continues ignoring, what a bitch)

IN THE CAR
OMG that was so stupid. We should totally say something else. Let's go nearer and ask something she definitely gotta answer.
So I got in the driver's seat -Petiunia Seng takut mati enjin tiba2 - and then we made another round while trying to figure out what to say. We were almost in front of her again but still we haven't came up with anything. Cue genius Mama.

Round 2
Mama: Kak, boleh tumpang tanya? McDonald's paling dekat kat mana?

Tranny: Huh?

Mama: McDonald's yang paling dekat. Kat mana?

Here comes the bestest part.
Tranny: (rubbing her pussy veeerry sloowly, like masturbating) Dekat sini. McDonald's dekat sini. Sini.

Mama: (keeping straight face) Tak, kita nak cari McDonald's yang boleh makan.

Tranny: (still rubbing her crotch) Ya. Dekat sini McDonald's.

Mama: Um, kalau macam tu, you ada berapa set? Berapa set McDonald's?

Tranny: (her hand is like glued to her pussy) Semua dekat sini.

OMG too funny! We were like splitting our sides laughing so we sped off again trying to compose ourselves. Mama wanted to video her so we made another round.

Round 3:

Mama: So kak, McD's tadi tu, macam mana nak buat order?

Tranny: Apa?

Mama: Macam mana nak buat pesanan untuk McDonald's awak?

Tranny: (walks real close to car and rubs her vag again) McDonald's dalam burit* saya. Dalam burit saya. Di sini. Dalam burit saya. (Goes over and over about the McD's in her pussy then gets fed up and walk away)

LOL. It was so funny we almost died. Now I can never ever again hear the words McDonald's without thinking filthy things and rubbing my crotch.


*Burit = for those who don't know, it's Terengganu slang for vagina. And apparently, some transsexuals can store Big Macs in theirs, along with other things I suppose.

Second Time Around

I was just complaning about the absolute pointlessness of revisiting high school over and over again, but today, I finally found its true purpose; to serve as a backdrop for MEGA camwhore sessions! Me and Nasa were talking bout how hideously ugly everyone (we) were during high school and how we're like sooo ashamed of showing people our high school pics because it's like, the Dark Ages of our lives in terms of looks. So Yewei came up with this fantabulous idea of going to school, dressed in school uniforms, just to camwhore. Genius, or what? After a looong search, I managed to dig out my uniform from God-knows-where and... I'm just gonna let the piccies show how fun the whole thing was hahah :D


Look! There I am, doing what I thought was the coolest thing a high-schooler could do, which is drive to school! Ooh la la~ The coolness factor comes from the fact that I was never able to drive in my last year while lots of people can. Well, made up for it! And it's like so not who I was, I never did the big sunnies and loosened-up tie way back in school. Yeah I was so geeky I pulled it all da way up LOL

At first, the shoot started out real normal, we were doing the usual camwhore routines with everyone's fave camwhore phone; mine!

We even tried to fake a 'candid' shot of us studying.

But seriously, dumb blondes like us are not meant for studying. Especially Chem.

And then soon, our real selves came out and the kiddie-friendly photos became xXx-rated ;)

Our very favorite subject.

Good girl.

Gone bad.

And takes on the other 'good' girl. Heh

Gosh, stripper poles in school? I approve :D

Fun times like this are what schools should be about. If I had my way, all students will be slutty and spend their days being taught how to pose for a picture LOL

Pucker Up, Bitch

Was making a U-turn when I was driving today. There was this motorcycle with two guys on it which was really far away and really off to the left so it's not like I was close to running them over. But anyways, I guess they must have had thought otherwise or maybe they were just hoping to get into a fight and scratch my fierce lil car. After the turn, they overtook me and then the guy at the back turned around, lifted his helmet and stared, no.. GLARED at me like I just murdered his whole family or something. So I was like, "what the fuck is your problem asshole?' and was just about to flip him the bird when I thought, you know, that's sooo predictable of me. So instead, what I did was... I blew him a kiss. Like, a really OTT, really gay, puckered lips, kissy sound, hand-wavey kinda kiss. LOL. And his reaction was priceless. I'm surprised he didn't fall off his bike. After he like got over the shock, he did this really DRAMATIC spitting on the ground thing with such force it's like his teeth's gonna fly out. Hilarious. Much funnier than if I had just gave him the usual finger. I wish I had a picture. I guess I found my new way of dealing with people with serious road rage issues. Muakz muakz ;D

Hello Schoolboy

For some inexplicable reason, I agreed to go with my friends to visit our old school today. I don't know why I did it; must have been tooo booooring at home, since I always say no when they plan these trips back to school. I mean, I never got the point of spending so much time doing these dwelling-on-the-past things. It's obvious that neither the students nor the teachers enjoy these spontaneous reunions very much. Ugh. In fact, it's like volunteering yourself for torture. The teachers probably don't know who we are unless we're like the unforgettable ones with straight A1s, excellent co-cu and other super achievements - and come to think of it, most of my friends are, so maybe it's just me then. Oh well.
Anyways, I love seeing the expressions on the teachers' faces. For the first 5 to 10 seconds, they're like struggling to remember who the hell you are, then when they finally think they got it right, they start to make awkward, stilted conversation. If they remember, they make sure you know it by dropping references about your parents, the things you used to do. Aww how sincere. No matter where you go, the things they say are universal. You talk to one teacher, you've talked to 20. They ask all these generic questions they've been asking to every former student they see every year, pretending to be interested while I stand there with a Miss World smile pretending to be interesting. Dear God.
I've had some real fantastic moments in high school, but it sure wasn't with the teachers, honey ;)

Spare the Mushy

Jac went to do her hair today. Found an old copy of ifeel at the salon. Stared at that page for like 5, 10 minutes. I'm going crazy god help me. LOL.


Thousands of miles away. One minute. Short but sweet. I'm going to sleep peaceful tonight :)

Money Small Consolation

Just received full pay this morning so I'm trying hard to be all glass-half-full and focus on all the goodies money can buy instead of getting down thinking of all the things it can't. Boo hoo. Feels like forever, I'm verging on desperation ha ha. No, I think I'm waaay past desperation. As happy as I am to be receiving $$$ over here, I also wanna be doing other things, seeing other people in KL ;) he he. I'm a greedy bitch who wants my cake, topped with icing & cherry, then eat it and ask for a 2nd helping. Whatever, I'm thinking positive and that means mentally spending all the cash already. Shoes and watches, here I come! LOL
Seriously though, I'm glad to see the end of SUKMA. If I had to answer another question about why I'm not off pursuing some gold medal or other while my sisters are busy bringing glory to the family name blah blah, I think I'll explode. Its like they keep trying to challenge my creativity to come up with smart, witty comebacks. I've given a million different responses and my current default one is just a lifeless 'he he he' that I hope implies the meaning 'shut the eff up or i'll cut u with my razr'. It's not like I'm jealous or anything (just a tiny bit OK!), but I don't wanna be made to feel like I've an STD, a criminal record and a drug addiction while the rest of the fam are sitcom-perfect. Like, get over it.
Anyways, just saw my sister and her boyfriend together for her tournament the other day and they were like so schweet! Hand-holding, sweat-wiping and food-feeding, awww. He even had like, A Serious Talk with my momma where they were talking bout Jac. Like seriously talking. Deep stuff. Scary. Are those wedding bells I hear?

The Working Man

5th day of being on the job but still I haven't mentioned the slightest detail about it. Of course, this is actually because of the job itself. Yeah, I'm proud to say that for the past week, I've been working (Yup! Me! Working!) at the aquatics centre for the SUKMA swimming event holding a very glitzy job title; Technical Official and also Competitors' Steward. Well, Technical is not so glitzy, Official is but yeah, whatever.
And yeah, I'm dead tired. Cuz whatever fancy names are just glorified versions of a runner which was what I was doing for the first few days - running around doing a totally tedious and unneccessary task. Get this, I actually escort the swimmers from where they gather and then walk them out to the pool. As if they haven't been doing these thing called 'walking' for years. As if they will get lost somewhere along the way from the marshall room to the numbered lanes where they already know they are going. On the first day, I walked like, a hundred times back and forth. And I wake up at 7 and go back home more than 12 hours later just for this oh-sooo-fun job. Maybe I should mention there's like this loooong 5-hour break in between heats and finals so the actual working time is just like, 4, 5 hours max. And the money isn't bad either. You know, just in case someone thinks my life is so sad and puts me on a charity list or something. It's not.
The job is not all bad and it's kinda fun, actually. Know why? I get to appear on TV! Admittedly, it's RTM1 but like, who cares, my face was on national television - for a few seconds if I'm lucky and the focus totally wasn't on me but hey, this is how shallow people (like moi) get their kicks. Hahaha.
But anyways... For the last couple days I've been promoted so I'm no longer running around but sitting in the control room emceeing! How cool is that? As everyone knows, I love the sound of my own voice (I'm just kidding, I'm self-absorbed but not to that extent) so to be able to do the announcing thingies for me was waaaay cooler than running around the pool. I still get to be on RTM, or at least, my voice did. Heheh. So my face and my voice has made it onto TV, when can I demand my very own dressing room and limousines? Hahahah I've even got my very own make-up artist ready ;) he he he
And of course, the glam factor for such a big event are the famous national athletes! I wouldn't usually consider them celebrities (I like mine in clubs and with sex scandals) but I guess they're celebs in their own right; some of 'em are really major, like going to the Olympics and stuff. They've got all the slutty girls (not gonna name names hehe) swooning trying to get pics, autographs, phone numbers and into their pants haha. I should have taken photos cuz they're like, famous and hot but so far, the only pics I've taken are camwhore pics when I'm curi-ing tulang. Not even pictures of Terengganu's 'impressive' aquatic centre.
But the best thing about doing this SUKMA thing was something not many people paid much attention to; the journalists covering the event. I love watching them work! (Hey, I'm a mass comm student, whaddya expect?) It's so exciting seeing them with their handheld cams and notepads rushing off to interview winners and record-breakers then running off to some corner to scribble their pieces on a pad or key an article into their laptops or dictate it over the phone. And then the next day I can compare what really happened and how it's reported in the papers. Looks like a nice job. But for now, I'm totally satisfied just doing my thing, talking too fast as an emcee and walking too slow as a steward. :D

2006 All Ovah Again!

Did someone just flip the calendar back a whole two years? Cause what I'm feeling lately is a very post-SPM, pre-college 2006 kinda feeling. Let's see, I'm stuck in KT for months (OK, 7 weeks) and it's a city now, but let's face it, apart from McD's and a couple bowling alleys, calling it a city is like Miuccia Prada putting on a shiny garbage bag on a stick-thin model and calling it fashion's new frontier. Exxagerate, much?
And seeing that I'm back to the pre-college days, I'm splitting hairs thinking of same ol' problems; where I'm going next, what the hell is gonna happen and will I have friends?? More importantly, friends like those I've met in the last 2 years: GREAT friends :D
And that's not all, just like my 16 year-old self, I CAN'T DRIVE. But now instead of not having a license, it's because of not having a car. Well, what can ya do when u have a car-crash streak like mine? (According to Cyntia & HowYee, I'm one helluva unlucky driver heheh). So yeah, I'm stuck long term in my dearly beloved hometown without the means to go for all-nite power yamcha sessions. It's like someone cut off my legs. Lucky for friends like CarWash.
And what else, yeah I'M BLOGGING. Again. Big Surprise. Ha ha. Can you imagine the level of boredom here that I'm taking to blogging just so I can kill off half an hour in ways other than staring at a wall. To get it in perspective, lemme compare what I usually do in KL on a Saturday at 11.30 p.m with what I did just now at 11.30. KL, Sat, 11.30 : Final touches on appearances before speeding off for a night that is only just beginning. KT, Sat, 11.30 p.m: Speeding back HOME. Yup, the definition of sad.